


Revelations in Apartment 42—Part I?

by terma_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Deliberate Badfic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-01-01
Updated: 2002-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:41:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26536000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terma_archivist/pseuds/terma_archivist
Summary: Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived atTER/MAand was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address onthe TER/MA collection profile.TER/MA September 1999 Challenge. It is time to have some fun.  This is one everybody is capable of doing, I think.  Even the best writers among us.  *g* So, we all read a lot of slash, right?  And we have all run across stories or mistakes so bad, we groan in misery and wonder what the hell the writer was thinking.  We all have little terms and pet peeves we hate to see in stories. Well this month's challenge is to write badfic.  I want to see stories that make me laugh they are so dreadful.  I want weeping manpoles, pendulous nutbags, winking puckered starfish of love, glistening bosoms...wait—that is the wrong genre.  If you mean you're, I want your.  Two,to and too can come and go at will.  Go find the worst mistakes you can , and write a story which includes them.  Whatever you do, DONT beta.  Write it at 5 in the morning after drinking 5 cups of expresso and not sleeping for 48 hours.  Or write it after having 18 shots of tequilla (or the poison of your choice). Whatever doesn't work for you.  Make it so dreadful, you can't read it without hanging your head in mock shame. And above all, have fun with it... --- OK, word of warning here.  These are really dreadful.  All are NC-17 for really bad taste.  If you looking for a good read, go elsewhere.Comment: Aw, Kriminee! I did say I would answer every single monthly challenge, didn't I? Well, this was encouraged by a sleepless night in a rainy camper and five or six glasses of Bacardi Limon. Plus, I just read five other responses, and I now feel as if my IQ was sufficiently lowered enough for me to add my own sad piece.
Relationships: Alex Krycek/Fox Mulder
Collections: TER/MA





	Revelations in Apartment 42—Part I?

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [TER/MA](https://fanlore.org/wiki/TER/MA) and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [the TER/MA collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/terma/profile).  
> TER/MA September 1999 Challenge. It is time to have some fun. This is one everybody is capable of doing, I think. Even the best writers among us. *g* So, we all read a lot of slash, right? And we have all run across stories or mistakes so bad, we groan in misery and wonder what the hell the writer was thinking. We all have little terms and pet peeves we hate to see in stories. Well this month's challenge is to write badfic. I want to see stories that make me laugh they are so dreadful. I want weeping manpoles, pendulous nutbags, winking puckered starfish of love, glistening bosoms...wait—that is the wrong genre. If you mean you're, I want your. Two,to and too can come and go at will. Go find the worst mistakes you can , and write a story which includes them. Whatever you do, DONT beta. Write it at 5 in the morning after drinking 5 cups of expresso and not sleeping for 48 hours. Or write it after having 18 shots of tequilla (or the poison of your choice). Whatever doesn't work for you. Make it so dreadful, you can't read it without hanging your head in mock shame. And above all, have fun with it... --- OK, word of warning here. These are really dreadful. All are NC-17 for really bad taste. If you looking for a good read, go elsewhere.   
> Comment: Aw, Kriminee! I did say I would answer every single monthly challenge, didn't I? Well, this was encouraged by a sleepless night in a rainy camper and five or six glasses of Bacardi Limon. Plus, I just read five other responses, and I now feel as if my IQ was sufficiently lowered enough for me to add my own sad piece.

  
**Revelations in Apartment 42: Part I?  
by Katail**

  
"Your such a looser, Mulder," Scully yelled as tossed her strawberry scented ahir and stalked out of the dark apartment. 

"Geez. she took that pretty bad," Mulder said to himself.. "You think she might be happy for me. I mean, if I was interested in her, then wouldn't we have hooked up before now??" Mulder sighed and was just glad that Scully didnt birng up all the really good reasons that he shouldn't be with Krycek. Who really cares if he killed my father or Melissa? the man made a mean casserole. "So I turned her down? So what? She'll get it on with Skinner evetually. probably in Part II" 

"Is she goen, Foxy?" An elvish cat like sable haired assasin poked his head around the corner from the kithcen. 

"Yes, Sexy Alexei." 

"Good, because I washed all the dishes, mopped the floor, rearranged the cabinets to suit my one-handedness, put down new shelf paper, and read all your e-mail. I'm bored now. Let's fuck." 

"Ok, but let;s order Chinese food first. I like to answer the door covered in your hot love juice." 

"No" alex leaped across the room like Superman and pinned Mulder to the wall. Then he ripped Mulder's clothes off. Buttons flew and shattered the tv screen. Mulder was excited. Alex was to. He was glad he didn't wear underwear, because his clothes were so much more complicated with the fake arm and all. 

Mulder lay back on the bed. "Sexy Alexei, how many differnet people have you slept with" 

"Male or female?" 

"Both. No, scrtach that. Just male" 

"Human or animal, and do Gods count?" 

"Umm....Just the human. " 

"Geez! Molder, how should I know?? Do you think I keep track?" 

"Well, what's all those knotches in your prostheictic arm for?" 

"That;s just were the handcuffs rubbed." 

"Oh, well, take a guess. " 

"Lets see...you, Skinner, Smoking man, the old English guy, Langly, Beyers, Methos, Kronos, that cop Ray in Chicago, some johns in Hong Kong,—hey! wait a minute. Do you mean fucking or just sexual activity in general? 

"Fucking." 

"Ok that rules out Frohike. Top or bottom?" 

"Doen't matter" 

"Okthen let;s see a scientist gut from that Jurassic island soem space cadets and 8 other clones just like eme. Abotu 30. Just men, of course, but baby you mean the most to me. I love you!" 

" I love you to baby!" 

"Can we fuck nowa?" 

"Oh, sure and since I mean the most, then you don';t hanve to use a condom. I know I'm safe and if you were going to kill me then I'm sure you would use a gun." 

Just then, Krychek rubbed his denim covered love pistol into Mulder's own hot rod. Mulder groaned. Alex moaned. "give to me baby! Fuck me SExy Alexei!" 

alex scrambled out of the rest of his clothes. and Mulder marveled at the pretty agents balancing act on the waterbed. Then a glint of sly green emerals peeked out under lashes long enough to put Tammy Faye to shame. Mulder had a second to wonder where Alex bought that brand of mascara before he was flipped over and his arms were held above his head while Alex licked his ankles and thighs and shoved two slippery fingers up his ass. 

"Lucky, I keep this trial size tube of lube in every pocket I own Huh foxy? 

Mulder groaned in response. He wondered how he could feel the bobbing wet erection on his buttcheeks, and still get his toes sucked and still couldn't move his arms. Maybe Alex was once a Russian acrobat in the circus? Mulder didn't care. Mulder was really, really ,really, horny, and he just wanted to get pounded. 

"Enough already with the preparation! Why do we need lube, anyway? I like it fast rough dirty like a rodeo in the summertime" 

"i care about you and I don;t want stuff done to you that was doen to me before I met you. I will always love you, and keep you,, and care for you, and do your laundry just the way you like it." 

"I just want you , Alex!" 

alex bit into Mulder 's shoulder hard enough to draw blood, but Mulder didn;'t care. He shoved back with his ass and whinnied!! Alex thrust his throbbing sword of desire into the tight channel and screamed!! 

Mulder;s downstairs neighbor punded on the ceiling. Alex thrust and withdrew out to the tip and then thrust again. Mulder was tossing his head and moaning. Then, Mulder's muscles tightened into a grip around alex's sword, and it was almost ripped off at the hilt. Then Alex came to. 

they snuggled up together like bunnies. "God! Alex1 That was bloody fantastic!" Alex looked at his sleek lover with the toned runner;'s legs. 

"You didn't tell me you were British." He said. 

"I did spend a lot of time in England you know at Oxford. That;s were I found out I was gay, because only people in college experiment with sexual orientation, and almost every guy in England in gay." 

"Oh! thank god for that. I found out when I was fourteen, and I was on the streets, and the Consortium offered me the chance to make something out of myself if I could suck cock really, really good." 

"|Wow, Sexy Alexei, that really sucks!" 

"yeah, I did, but they taught me how to cook, sow, manage money, and shoot a 9MM to. I cant complian, Foxy" 

"Me neither, baby. So are you going to show me how well they taught you to suck or do I have to dress you up as Goldie Locks again and whip you again?" 

"Hmmm/......tough decision." 

end 

OK. That's enough. Oh, and I was kidding about the Part II bit. Katail 

* * *

Rating: NC-17   
Comment: Aw, Kriminee! I did say I would answer every single monthly challenge, didn't I? Well, this was encouraged by a sleepless night in a rainy camper and five or six glasses of Bacardi Limon. Plus, I just read five other responses, and I now feel as if my IQ was sufficiently lowered enough for me to add my own sad piece.   
Disclaimer: These poor souls belong to CC and Fox. There is no way in hell anyone could make money with this crap.   
---


End file.
